Leaving livejournal for several months usually grants me zero friends to come back to, so a genuine thanks to those of you who still even moderately care about me.  I genuinely missed and thought about  you guys often. 

I still work for Merry Maids, which I hate about 75% of the time.  The other 25% that I do enjoy is driving around beautiful western Washington with my crazy partner, Tiffany.  The actual work pretty much always sucks.  But it pays the bills, and it's better to me than a clerical job would be.  It keeps me active at least.  Although it usually leaves me physically exhausted and sometimes in pain, I feel proud of how strong I've become.  I'm gaining muscle even though I still have a(n  un)healthy layer of fat over it. 

Some things stay the same...but mostly life evolves.

Right around the time I stopped journaling, Robert, Jason and I moved into a little 3bed, 1bath house in North Seattle.  It's lovely, and I wish I had pictures on hand to display, but Sunday laziness conquers all.  Btw, any remote sense of adoration and attraction to Robert is gone.  Mostly I just find him annoying now.  And his friends...oh dear god, do I find his friends annoying (with few exceptions).  So, today I trumphantly proclaim: Today is Jason's and my 3 year anniversary.  Going strong.  Things are good.

I just got back from New York City.  I went with my mom, sister, two aunts and grandma.  Girls only vacation for Grandma's 70th birthday.  It's a family tradition for big birthdays, but the first time my sister and I were invited.  It was amazing.  We saw two broadway shows: 9 to 5 the musical, and Blythe Spirit.  Amazing.  Per lawyer-aunt-Susan's treat, we dined at a 5-star restaurant.  Favorite quote out of that restaurant: "May I offer an ottoman for your purse?"  "Why, yes, you may."  OMG, the food was delicious.  I didn't see it, but for six people, I think the bill was about a thousand dollars.  Best guess. 

Now for the super-stressful, life is not-so-great news.  And mostly it's Regarding Robert.

About two weeks ago, Robert was fired from his bartending job for "questioning authority."  His complaints were completely justified in that the restaurant manager is running the business into the ground by making poor choices.  They bounced his paycheck, so he had to badger them for the money, plus reimbursement for overdraft fees.  They also took the till out of the bar, and he couldn't help but remind them day after day how stupid it was.  Grantid, they fucked him over, but most people are in the intereset of protecting their livelihood, which is the reason I don't tell my boss exactly what I think of him.  Most people have enough sense to bite their tounge, find a new job, and say a final fuck you as they walk out the door for the last time.  Robert got fired because he doesn't have that sense of self preservation.  And he has family, including Jason, that will pay his rent if he gets fired. 

Recently, Unemployed Bob has taken to lashing out at everyone, including the people who cover his rent.  Him and Jason got into a screaming match on Wednesday...and Robert and I had one weeks ago.  Oh, and you know how Robert has a suspended liscense because he has been unable/refused to pay court fees?  Well, he got arrested for that last night while camping.  Him and his friends were being beligerantly drunk, and apparently they caught a cop's attention.  He had a warrant.  Bail is $1,000, and no one here can afford to put that up...I wouldn't if I could.  He needs to grow the fuck up.  He'll be 28 at the end of this month.  That is too old to not be able to hold down a job and keep your shit together.  Thank you, and amen.  I don't feel sorry for him. 

I will not let stupid brother ruin my anniversary.

At least he'll be out of the house for the night.  Because we're broke (and planning on seeing the new HP movie next week GEEKOUT), I'm going to prepare a nice meal at home for Jason and I.  He's working until 7:30 anyway.  I'll light some candles, put on some music, and we'll fuck like bunnies all over the house.  Then maybe watch a movie.  Sounds perfect. 

I hope everyone is doing well. 

I'm alive, and life is hectic and wonderful.  Hope you all are doing well.  I hope to be back soon.

I woke up at 5:30 this morning and spewed my guts for a good 15 minutes.  It was not pleasant.  I had about a 5 second warning, was grabbing pants to put on (the first time sleeping in my underwear has bit me in the ass), when it just starting coming.  It was hopeless.  Even if I had been wearing clothes, or had a robe to throw on, I probably would've barely made it out my door. 

I thought it was food poisoning, but no one else got sick.  It wasn't until I called my mom and she asked me if I was concerned did it occur to me that I could be pregnant.  I highly doubt it/am choosing to be optimistic, until I can take a test and know for sure.  

I feel fine now...don't feel sick and haven't felt nauseous since this morning.  I'll get a test today just to ease my mind....because I'm pretty sure I'm not.  Jason and I are really careful.

Merry Christmas to everyone!  I hope you all are having a wonderful holiday.

Mine's been great so far.  Jason, Robert, and I stayed up til midnight last night then opened presents.  Jason got me an XBox 360 and Rock Band.  I was astonished/baffled/excited/grateful/angry...I was only slightly miffed that he spent so much money...seeing as though we don't have much and need to save for an apartment.  Whatever...I can't be pissed about a gift like that.  We've been playing all day.

So....that makes three new drugs I've tried since being in Seattle.  Anyone wanna guess what last night's adventure entailed? 

I fucking love Christmas because the people I'm fortunate enough to receive gifts from know me really well.  Meaning, I usually get what I either ask for or need.  I'm very practical.  I like getting gifts that I'd like to buy for myself, but am too fucking cheap to do so.  For example, recent awesome gifts have included a computer, digital camera, Nintendo DS, etc.  My mom also has a great habit of buying me necessities like shampoo, conditioner, face soap, toothbrushes.  It's like I don't have to go shopping for toiletries for several months.  This year I'm asking my mom for a combo printer and a carton of cigarettes (smokes are hella cheap in Los Angeles compared to Seattle).  I might ask Jason to have my digital camera fixed because it'll take pictures but the screen doesn't work right.  I do like to be suprised, but most people simply ask me what I want.  I can't help but be pleased with the result.  :)

I love Christmas, and I'm trying to find a second job so that I can get people really awesome Christmas gifts.  I hate being broke this time of year because I like to make people feel good.  And getting someone exactly the right gift makes me feel good.  I want to get people what I want to get them without being limited by funds.  Argh!Stress.

I'm making money on ebay (close to $500 now, yay!), but that's for bills strictly.  Wow.  Adulthood sucks sometimes, but it's a whole lot more fun than being a teenager. 

It says, "It's only a matter of time..."

Ween is easily the weirdest fucking music duo to ever exist. No exaggeration necessary. Truthfully, it makes more sense when you're on drugs, which is easy to understand given that Jean and Dean Ween (I have no idea if those are their real names) do a lot of fucking drugs...and create their music accordingly. I enjoy it. I hope at least one of you might as well.








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...words spoken by both me and "my new best friend," Piper, to Robert regarding this:

Robert calls me.  Says, in so many words, "I want you to go hang out with my friend Piper, whom you have never met, because I told her we'd hang out, but I'm tied up with something a little longer, and I think you guys would really hit it off."

The point is, I'm about to do something completely unlike me.  And so is Piper, my new best friend whom I've never met.  I'm gonna call this girl, and go over to her house (with psychedelic chocolates) to hang out.  Robert thinks we'll be best friends, and we both need friends right now...so, okay.  I'll let you know how it goes. 

What is the most rando​m objec​t aroun​d you? a Cutco knife sharpener that I plan to sell on ebay.

Last time consu​med alcoh​ol?​​ a week ago

What were you doing​ at 8:00 this morni​ng?​​ sleeping

What were you doing​ 30 minut​es ago? watching tv

Last place​ you took a plane​ to? well, seattle, back from long beach

Who was the last perso​n you talke​d to on the phone​?​ jason

Have you ever been aroun​d someo​ne who was high?​​ um, yes.  I'm actually a little buzzed right now.

Last thing​ you purch​ased?​ ​cigarettes and a rock star

Where​ are you right​ now? In my room in our house in tukwila, wa

Expla​in why you last threw​ up? the last time I can think of was over 2 and a half years ago and it was because of gross mexican food, but I may have thrown up because of being sick more recently...i don't remember. 

What are your plans​ for the weeke​nd?​​ no plans yet..

Ever kisse​d someo​ne who smoke​s? yes, everyday

Favor​ite memor​y at the momen​t?​​ a fresh one...robert and i picking mushrooms today.  it was fun, and I got a lot of exercise. 

Are you a jealo​us perso​n?​​ not really

Did you have a good birth​day ? I'm having a really hard time remembering what...oh yeah.  Yes.  It was low-key...dinner, drinks, sex, and pot pretty much sums it up. 

Are you tired​ right​ now? no

What are your outlo​oks on gay/​​bisex​ual relat​ionsh​ips?​​ hot (I like Lena's answer)...yeah, I agree with that.

Do you chew on your straw​s?​ ​sometimes

Who did you last have a sleep​over with?​​ um, jason doesn't count...

Last text messa​ge?​​ jason

What are you doing​?​ ​this

How many child​ren do you plan on havin​g?​ maybe a couple...never more than two.

Three​ days from now will you be in a relat​ionsh​ip?​​ probably

Is your hair curly​?​​ only right now, because I had braids earlier...but not normally.

Somet​hing you alway​s have with you? CHAPSTICK...it's like crack

Do you get good grade​s?​​ in college, yeah

What keeps​ you stres​sed?​​ lately, Jason...and the money situation isn't right

Have you ever told someo​ne of the oppos​ite/​​same sex you loved​ them?​​ yes/no

Where​ are your favor​ite pair of jeans​ from?​​ um, torrid?  I'm a fatty.

What do you hear this very secon​d?​​ my computer, planes, typing

Have you ever been awake​ for 48 hours​ strai​ght?​​ yes

How did you get one of your scars​?​ cracked my forehead on a table.

How are you feeli​ng at this momen​t?​​​  chill

How did your night​ go last night​? um, not good.  jason fell asleep on the bus and I had to go find him. 

How did you do in high schoo​l?​​ pretty shitty grades, no self-esteem...yeah, it was pretty bad, but I had a lot of fun.

How did you get the shirt​ you'​​​re weari​ng?​​​ goodwill.  It says, "Abby Normal."  If you get that, you rock (you guys rock anyway)

How much money​ did you spend​ last month​?​​ the fact that I don't have a fucking clue scares me a little.  Not much, i don't think.  I don't have a job.

How old do you want to be when you get marri​ed?​​​ probably will never happen, by my own choice, not circumstance. 

How old will you be at your next birth​day?​​​ 23

Your mothe​rs name?​​​ Lauri

What is the most impor​tant part of your life?​​​ i don't know how to answer that

What alway​s makes​ you feel bette​r when you’r​e upset​?​​​ pot and sleep

What’​s the most impor​tant thing​ you look for in a signi​fican​t other​?​​​  sense of humor, intelligence

What are you worri​ed about​?​​​ why worry?

What did you have for break​fast?​​​ cereal

Have you ever liked​ someo​ne who had a girlf​riend​/​​​boyfr​iend?​​​ yes

Have you ever had your heart​ broke​n?​​​ i thought i had, but it still works

Have you ever been out of the count​ry?​​​ yep, to canada and mexico

Have you ever had sex on the beach​?​​​ yes, between blankets

Have you ever read an entir​e book in one day? yep...

Who was the last perso​n you saw? robert

Who was the last perso​n you hungo​ut with?​​​ robert and gabe

Who was the last perso​n to call you? jason

Where​ does your best frien​d live?​​​ with me

Where​ did you last go? to the park to pick mushrooms

Where​ did you sleep​ last night​?​​​ here

Do you ever wish you were someo​ne else?​​​ no

Does the futur​e scare​ you? yes and no.  i think things are going to crap, but I don't fear it.

Are you happy​ with your life right​ now? for the most part, but things could always be better.

National sex with impunity day, with no repercussions.  Idea stolen from Dan Bern, who is a god.  Watch this.

It's a shitty feeling when you realize that you don't matter to as many people as you thought or hoped you did.  And by "you" I mean me.  I only ever said it out loud once, and only to Jason...but I got pretty depressed right before we left California.  When high school friends Priscilla, Diana, Melissa, and Christina didn't care enough to hang out with me one last time before I left the state.  When Borders friend, Lauren, stood me up for our party date (she was supposed to be my "date" for my mom's birthday party...she didn't show).   And now, Kyna hasn't responded to any of my emails. 

It's frustrating...but I accept that I am only missed by family.  Which is fine.  Fuck the rest.

Oh my god, we're moving tomorrow.  Unplugging the computers now.  I'll update when we get there. 

Love you guys,
Sara

 Anyone read Even Cowgirls Get the Blues by Tom Robbins?  I'm half-way through and I'm in love with it.

I heard (read) a lot of good book news today.   

Firstly, Christopher Moore announced a release date for his new book, Fool.  February 10th, which is a long way away, but Chris Moore is golden and always worth the wait.  And I think the following book will feature one of my all-time favorite fictional characters, Abby Normal.  She rocks.  

Rant, my favorite of Chuck Palahniuk's more recent novels has been optioned, so we may see a movie of that in the next few years.  YAY!

Moving next Thursday, and omg...omg...omg.

I'm overwhelmed.  Tonight, we're partying at my parents' house.  It's my mom's birthday, so it's a combo birthday/going away party.  Except, I really don't have any friends (I do, but they're all Jason's family and stuff).  I've always been kind of a loner by choice.  I prefer solitude or one-on-one hanging out.  So, when I tried to think of people to invite to my going away party, I came back with nothing.  And Jason isn't even going because he has to work.  So, I didn't really want to invite anyone from his family because I would feel like I had to entertain them, and I'm sure we're going to have a get-together at Anne's house before we leave.  My "second-tier" friends are people I don't see often enough to really want to invite them to a party.  So, I invited one person.  Lauren.  We used to work together at Borders and I love her.  She's so awesome.  Other than that, it'll just be family friends.  My parents' friends who have been in my life for a very long time.  

I'm so glad I'm leaving this place.  

Oh, and the cats are going to stay with my parents for a little while.  My mom will take good care of them, but I still feel shitty about leaving them behind.  

I hope everyone is doing well.  I'm trying to make commenting rounds today.  

Today is my last day at work! 

...so that I wont have to work in a hot ass office, talking to really obnoxious customers all day.

...so that I wont have to drive over the Vincent-Thomas bridge 2-4 times a day.

...so that I don't have to drive alongside gigantoid big-riggs wherever I go.

...so that I wont have to breathe air from the busiest port in the country.  

...because in Seattle, I'll be able to get pot whenever I want (I know this to be fact, because Robert doesn't go a day without smoking and he can usually score weed in 5 minutes flat). 

...because California is too sunny for my taste. 

...because discovering the nuances of a new city sounds exciting.

...because I'm sick of paying for half of Mike and Kyna's internet and phone (we share, but Jason and I don't use the phone at all), which comes to $60 a month, when I could get internet for $15.  

...because I'm tired of paying the gas for at least two units in my building because the water heater happens to be in my unit.  

...because, honestly, I'm a little bit sick of some of the people here.  

...because I keep finding poisonous spiders in my apartment.

...because I'm fucking bored here. 

We're moving two weeks from today, and I just know it's going to fly by.  I still have a million things to do, and I'm fighting the urge to check out of work early everyday.  That's the thing about being able to negotiate your own hours...sometimes the check is very tiny.  And we need the money, so I'm forcing myself to stay, even though there's really nothing for me to do here, so I spend all my time thinking about better things I could be doing with my time.  

After work, I'm going to my parents' house to buy some pot.  It'll probably be the last time that happens, so I have to save some for the trip.  I'm having lunch with my sister in about an hour, which will rock.  I love hanging out with her, even though we're so vastly different. 

My apartment is a disaster because I took the bookshelf and table to my parents' house for the yard sale.  So now everything is in boxes, and not even packed ready for moving, just kind of thrown around.  blah.  We need to clean, but we're waiting for pizza.  The yard sale was definitely worth it.  I made about $100, but didn't get rid of any furniture, which sucks.  I sold our TV and DVD player though.  3 weeks, no TV. 

So, apparently we do have a place to move to, but it has its downsides.  Firstly, it's a house with 3 or 4 dudes in it.  So, I'm gonna be the only girl.  I told Jason that they'll be disappointed that I'm not HOTT.  We do get our own room though, which is a plus.  The biggest problem though, is that we can't take the cats just yet.  We'll have to leave them with someone for about a month, and then Jason's mom could bring them up.  I feel so bad about it.  I don't want them to think I'm abandoning them.  Oh my god, it makes me ache.  The owner of the house "wants to get to know us first" and "isn't comfortable with us bringing cats until he knows us."  I think it's our only option though.  I feel so bad about it.  Although, it does free up space in the car, and we may not have to ship anything at all. 

 I chew on my lips.  Not hard enough to break skin usually and not the visible part of my lips, but I have small circles of scar tissue on the inside of my lips.  I do it when I'm nervous, and also when I'm thinking deeply about something.